SPIRITBOOST

How to Live the Life You Desire

2009-03-01T08:09:00.000-08:00

Lately the issue of a person's circle of influence has been coming up in my conversations. A great example is taking business advice from people who have never run a business before. You know the old saying "success creates success." It's true for so many other areas as well. A lot of times we go searching for the answers to life's problems from people who have never walked the road we are traveling. That amazing thing is how often we hope to just fall into success, the right circumstances, or right people. I have found that in all areas of life success can only come through a process of careful planning, being strategic with your people, and being purpose-full. Here are some tidbits on each.

Careful Planning

Many of you I'm sure have heard the old saying, "fail to plan, plan to fail." I have seen example after example of this truth. Most people don't understand the amount of direction and momentum needed to get something off the ground and even more importantly how much energy is needed to change the direction of the ship. I have experienced this in my own life. Early in my business life I failed to carefully plan out the proper goals and expectations for my business. As a result my business and team rarely grew the way I wanted it do. It was only when I began to respect the planning process that I was able to change the direction of the ship.

Being Strategic

Most often when I mention being strategic I am referring to people. A lot of times we aren't very strategic about the people we allow into our life. I have always been a big stick about people. For a period of years I strayed away from this principle and paid pretty heavily for it. If you are hoping to be a disciplined, efficient person in your personal and/or professional life it's important to surround yourself with disciplined, efficient people. I have seen many people wonder why their relationships aren't better or stronger and are five minutes later having a pity party with people in the same circumstance.

Being Purpose-full

Yes it's a small play on words. Being Purpose-full means understanding your purpose and passions in life. Nothing sucks more than a job or relationship you don't like. Always look beneath the surface of your circumstances. Sometimes we end up doing things in life for the wrong reason. For example taking a high paying job that you hate so that you can live your life at a certain level, or having a relational association that doesn't fit your personality or beliefs. You might do this because of what they bring to the table when in fact it just isn't worth it.

Everything in life is about direction and passion. We are most creative and productive when we do things we enjoy. Stay focused on what you really want and watch things carefully turn around for you.

Source : Mikhail Hutton

Self-Confidence – Take Time To Help Yourself

2009-02-28T00:03:00.000-08:00

One very important quality that a person must possess in order to achieve total happiness and contentment in their life is self-confidence. Self-confidence refers to people believing that they have to ability to do certain things. It could be anything, such as performing well at work, building a house, or simply interacting with their children. It is often easier for person to have more confidence in others than in themselves. This is not healthy, and a person will almost always fail at whatever they attempt to do in life without self-confidence. Self-confidence is what gives people the drive to work toward a certain goal. It makes people feel good about themselves. Those that are self-confident are happier and are able to achieve their goals more easily.

Self-confidence is a must-have in the corporate world. If a person lacks this extremely important quality then they are usually overlooked when it comes time for promotions, raises and special assignments. People without self-confidence are not very noticeable to supervisors; they merely sit quietly in the background, ignored. Employees with self-confidence are more articulate, motivated and ambitious, and work hard to achieve their work-related goals. They feel good about themselves and their ability to perform their job. They strive to transcend in ways that those who lack self-confidence only dream about. The corporate world is extremely competitive and does not wait around for the meek to gain self-esteem, which is why if a person wants to be successful, they must first work on improving their self-confidence.

There are several ways to boost one’s self-confidence. One sure-fire way is by working on one’s physical appearance. Exercising, eating properly and dressing well are excellent ways of doing this. If people feel good about the way they physically look then eventually they will begin to feel the same way inwardly, and self-confidence will blossom. Another way to boost self-confidence is by achieving small goals. Perhaps a person could work on small items that they have been procrastinating about, like a small home improvement project, for instance. By completing these projects, no matter how small, and seeing the quality of the final product, a person’s self-confidence will be boosted in no time.

Additionally, if a person’s self-esteem is low, there are other ways to help give it a boost. Helping others when they’re in need naturally makes everyone feel good. It boosts self-confidence for a person to see that someone is better off because of something that they did to help. It may be something small or something major; it doesn’t matter because even the little things count.

If a person continues to work diligently on boosting their self-confidence by using these techniques, they can transform themselves from an introvert who is afraid to speak up for him or herself, to a confident, expressive person that has no trouble voicing their opinions or telling others ‘no.’ Pretty soon after working on increasing their self-esteem to a healthy, normal level, they will start to see that they will be the person benefiting from all the promotions, raises and special assignments, and they will no longer be ignored and overlooked.

Source : Michael Jeffreys

Stress Reduction Through Gratitude

2009-02-27T23:38:00.000-08:00

We are all aware of the stressful times we are surrounded with, and these situations can easily lead us to feeling overwhelmed. Learning to combat stress is a helpful skill we can learn so as to regain a maximized quality of life. There is a very effective way of doing this, through cognitive redirection, and focusing on the positive aspects of our lives instead of the negative ones. By taking the time to acknowledge good fortune in our lives, and not allowing setbacks or problems to become dominating factor in our outlook allows us to deal with stress on a more successful level.

Many times it’s just easier to be ungrateful about the things we do not have instead of being grateful for the positive things we have been dealt or what we have achieved. These positive parts of our lives are often overlooked and taken for granted until some sort of disaster hits. All too often we can forget about having a roof over our heads, a warm bed and even a hot shower. Once we can identify those things for which we have to be grateful for, we have the perfect exercise for positive thinking, and it could actually change our feelings towards stress as well as balancing out the related effects.

The factors causing stress are many, but it is defined as a state where an individual is not in equilibrium with their individual surroundings. It is known to us now that the distinction between both body and mind is of limited usefulness. Negative thoughts are able to have an affect on the body, just as trauma can affect the mind. Experiences of stress prompting negative emotions may have a direct affect when it comes to body chemistry. In response to any threat or stress, our bodies produce hormones and other chemicals, such as adrenalin and cortisol.

Fortunately this works both ways. A calming environment along with some positive thoughts can fight the mental and physical effects of stress. Allow yourself a bit of time every day simply to concentrate on the positive – even if it is as little as a few minutes – you will be able to remove yourself from the causes and effects of stress.

The need to recognize those bursts of good fortune can have a radical effect on our perspective. Problems have a tendency to cast a dark cloud so to speak over the parts of our lives that are going well and distorting our perspective on things. Let’s take for example that sense of panic we feel when tasks are uncompleted instead of giving ourselves some praise over what we did accomplish. When the period of stress is prolonged or extended, it is entirely possible for us to develop unhealthy patterns of jumping automatically to a negative conclusion. By focusing on those things that make us happy is a very powerful technique we can use to overcome that pattern of thinking negatively, thereby reducing stress as well as giving a boost to the immune system.

When you are stressed or tense, it may start out looking like quite a bit of hard work to identify those things you are grateful for. Practice and patience will provide you with the ability to take the time to smell the roses so to speak. At first it may be a case of hindsight being 20/20 but with time it will become automatic.

While training yourself to be able to recognize those many things to be grateful for, you will stop taking things for granted. Seeing those items that may seem trivial to some, such as the bud of a new leaf on a tree, or a new tulip in the garden, will trigger the recognition and with it the internal need for celebration. As it becomes integrated more easily into your daily routine you will be able to see just how the process can reinforce your ability to deal with stress while you practice positive thinking.

Source : Deanna Collins

3 Powerful Techniques To Help Master Persuasive Public Speaking!

2009-02-27T05:58:00.000-08:00

The most successful orators mastered the art of persuasive public speaking. Whether they were leaders or activists, they had an ability to leave people hanging on their every word. They inspired people to take action. They motivated people to change.

No one is born with a talent for public speaking. Every successful speaker had to overcome their anxieties and deal with the stress of the situation in order to develop their knowledge and skills. You can to!

There is a high demand for persuasive public speaking. Teachers and salespeople, presidents and coaches all rely on their ability to persuade people that they have the answers – or at least know the right questions. These skills can apply to any work environment. Just think of the accomplishments you could be missing if you don’t master the art of persuasive public speaking.

1. Believe in yourself and in your message. You have to have faith in yourself as well as the message you are delivering. If you do not believe in the content of your speech, you won’t be able to speak about it with passion or sincerity, both of which are keys to persuasive public speaking.

People want to invest in companies or leaders that reflect their values; they value integrity. If you cannot convey a sense of sincerity, people will wonder if you’re holding back essential information. They’ll wonder if there’s something you are not telling them. To stop this doubt, you need to be as confident and straightforward as possible.

2. Create a big presence. Don’t hide behind the podium or make small, insignificant gestures. Enthusiasm and passion need to be conveyed. To accomplish this, take up as much space on the stage as you can. For example, when you ask a question, take a step forward. When you begin to deliver the answer, take a thoughtful step backwards.

One of our first impulses when we are new to public speaking is to stand timidly at the front of the room. We clasp our hands tightly in front of us and lean over the microphone. This will not result in persuasive public speaking. Instead, make gestures using your arms. Point them into the audience. Use them to compare and contrast two points, like scales. Good examples of this are late-night infomercials. Take notice of the way they use their body to accentuate their sales pitch.

3. Use your voice. You most basic tool, when it comes to persuasive public speaking, is your voice. We use our voice to make an impression on our audience. People are more profoundly influenced by how someone talks, than what he or she says. Use the pitch, volume, and quality of your voice to their best advantage. Soften your voice for emphasis and vary your pitch to express emotion.

If you’re able to use these three points during your next presentation, you’ll be well on your way to mastering persuasive public speaking.

Source : Sean Kenaston

Law Of Attraction: Are You Attractive?..

2009-02-27T05:22:00.000-08:00

When you learn about the Law of Attraction for the first time, you may think you can just 'start using it'...Soon, all those fun, cool things and circumstances will begin coming your way!

There is truth in this - because the cool, fun things will come - however they will come faster when you really let it sink in WHO is in control here. YOU are in control, and that means you're in control of all the stuff you DON'T want, too. To say that we can attract and create all the fun stuff without taking responsibility for the things we perceive as negative is to see only half the picture.

We create it ALL. If you are miserable at your job, then you created being miserable at your job. There will be other people in the world who are happy doing that same job. Of course, it's OK to be miserable...what's not OK when it comes to conscious creation is to deny that you are the cause of the misery.

The wise Eleanor Roosevelt is said to have remarked, "No one can make you feel inferior without your permission." I believe this is a fundamental principle which applies to any feeling but in this case any negative feeling, whether sadness, anger or any sort of misery. No one and nothing outside of you can cause misery.

We may have heard this theory in different ways all of our lives, because these are constants that hold true whether we are aware of them or not. However, it is only when we REALLY think deeply on this and accept responsibility for everything in our lives, that we are free to begin creating otherwise.

The Law of Attraction works unerringly and always. You ARE attracting and creating, at every moment. So...if you've been feeling stuck, it's because you are! To 'unstick' yourself, try asking some different questions: instead of 'Why is this happening to me?' try, 'Why would I want to create this situation in my life? What am I trying to protect myself from? What am I avoiding by being stuck in this?'

You ARE attractive...so what are you attracting?

Source : Shauna Arthurs

10 Amazing Facts about Love

2009-02-26T07:08:00.000-08:00

Love is a light of your life. Everyone know that love increases our live’s quality. If still there are some people who don’t believe this, we have found some funny scientific love facts to prove this theory:)

1. People are more likely to tilt their heads to the right when kissing instead of the left (65 percent of people go to the right!).

2. The oldest known love song was written 4,000 years ago and comes from an area between the Tigris and Euphrates Rivers.

3. One in five long-term love relationships began with one or both partners being involved with others.

4. Falling in love can induce a calming effect on the body and mind and raises levels of nerve growth factor for about a year, which helps to restore the nervous system and improves the lover’s memory.

5. Love can also exert the same stress on your body as deep fear. You see the same physiological responses—pupil dilation, sweaty palms, and increased heart rate.

6. Philadelphia International Airport finished as the No. 1 best airport for making a love connection, according to a recent survey.

7. Men who kiss their wives in the morning live five years longer than those who don’t.

8. The tradition of the diamond engagement ring comes from Archduke Maximillian of Austria who, in the 15th century, gave a diamond ring to his fiancée, Mary of Burgundy.

9. People who are newly in love produce decreased levels of the hormone serotonin —as low as levels seen in people with obsessive-compulsive disorder. Perhaps that’s why it’s so easy to feel obsessed when you’re smitten.

10. According to mathematical theory, we should date a dozen people before choosing a long-term partner; that provides the best chance that you’ll make a love match.

P.S.: This one may not surprise you, but we had to share it: Having a romantic relationship makes both genders happier. The stronger the commitment, the greater the happiness!

Source : Emily

Get Off Your Butt: 16 Ways to Get Motivated When You’re in a Slump

2009-02-26T06:56:00.001-08:00

JUMP: 系列 Photographer：老0

Even the most motivated of us — you, me, Tony Robbins — can feel unmotivated at times. In fact, sometimes we get into such a slump that even thinking about making positive changes seems too difficult.

But it’s not hopeless: with some small steps, baby ones in fact, you can get started down the road to positive change.

Yes, I know, it seems impossible at times. You don’t feel like doing anything. I’ve been there, and in fact I still feel that way from time to time. You’re not alone. But I’ve learned a few ways to break out of a slump, and we’ll take a look at those today.

One Goal. Whenever I’ve been in a slump, I’ve discovered that it’s often because I have too much going on in my life. I’m trying to do too much. And it saps my energy and motivation. It’s probably the most common mistake that people make: they try to take on too much, try to accomplish too many goals at once. You cannot maintain energy and focus (the two most important things in accomplishing a goal) if you are trying to do two or more goals at once. It’s not possible — I’ve tried it many times. You have to choose one goal, for now, and focus on it completely. I know, that’s hard. Still, I speak from experience. You can always do your other goals when you’ve accomplished your One Goal.
Find inspiration. Inspiration, for me, comes from others who have achieved what I want to achieve, or who are currently doing it. I read other blogs, books, magazines. I Google my goal, and read success stories. Zen Habits is just one place for inspiration, not only from me but from many readers who have achieved amazing things.
Get excited. This sounds obvious, but most people don’t think about it much: if you want to break out of a slump, get yourself excited about a goal. But how can you do that when you don’t feel motivated? Well, it starts with inspiration from others (see above), but you have to take that excitement and build on it. For me, I’ve learned that by talking to my wife about it, and to others, and reading as much about it as possible, and visualizing what it would be like to be successful (seeing the benefits of the goal in my head), I get excited about a goal. Once I’ve done that, it’s just a matter of carrying that energy forward and keeping it going.
Build anticipation. This will sound hard, and many people will skip this tip. But it really works. It helped me quit smoking after many failed attempts. If you find inspiration and want to do a goal, don’t start right away. Many of us will get excited and want to start today. That’s a mistake. Set a date in the future — a week or two, or even a month — and make that your Start Date. Mark it on the calendar. Get excited about that date. Make it the most important date in your life. In the meantime, start writing out a plan. And do some of the steps below. Because by delaying your start, you are building anticipation, and increasing your focus and energy for your goal.
Post your goal. Print out your goal in big words. Make your goal just a few words long, like a mantra (”Exercise 15 mins. Daily”), and post it up on your wall or refrigerator. Post it at home and work. Put it on your computer desktop. You want to have big reminders about your goal, to keep your focus and keep your excitement going. A picture of your goal (like a model with sexy abs, for example) also helps.
Commit publicly. None of us likes to look bad in front of others. We will go the extra mile to do something we’ve said publicly. For example, when I wanted to run my first marathon, I started writing a column about it in my local daily newspaper. The entire island of Guam (pop. 160K) knew about my goal. I couldn’t back down, and even though my motivation came and went, I stuck with it and completed it. Now, you don’t have to commit to your goal in your daily newspaper, but you can do it with friends and family and co-workers, and you can do it on your blog if you have one. And hold yourself accountable — don’t just commit once, but commit to giving progress updates to everyone every week or so.
Think about it daily. If you think about your goal every day, it is much more likely to become true. To this end, posting the goal on your wall or computer desktop (as mentioned above) helps a lot. Sending yourself daily reminders also helps. And if you can commit to doing one small thing to further your goal (even just 5 minutes) every single day, your goal will almost certainly come true.
Get support. It’s hard to accomplish something alone. When I decided to run my marathon, I had the help of friends and family, and I had a great running community on Guam who encouraged me at 5K races and did long runs with me. When I decided to quit smoking, I joined an online forum and that helped tremendously. And of course, my wife Eva helped every step of the way. I couldn’t have done these goals without her, or without the others who supported me. Find your support network, either in the real world or online, or both.
Realize that there’s an ebb and flow. Motivation is not a constant thing that is always there for you. It comes and goes, and comes and goes again, like the tide. But realize that while it may go away, it doesn’t do so permanently. It will come back. Just stick it out and wait for that motivation to come back. In the meantime, read about your goal (see below), ask for help (see below), and do some of the other things listed here until your motivation comes back.
Stick with it. Whatever you do, don’t give up. Even if you aren’t feeling any motivation today, or this week, don’t give up. Again, that motivation will come back. Think of your goal as a long journey, and your slump is just a little bump in the road. You can’t give up with every little bump. Stay with it for the long term, ride out the ebbs and surf on the flows, and you’ll get there.
Start small. Really small. If you are having a hard time getting started, it may be because you’re thinking too big. If you want to exercise, for example, you may be thinking that you have to do these intense workouts 5 days a week. No — instead, do small, tiny, baby steps. Just do 2 minutes of exercise. I know, that sounds wimpy. But it works. Commit to 2 minutes of exercise for one week. You may want to do more, but just stick to 2 minutes. It’s so easy, you can’t fail. Do it at the same time, every day. Just some crunches, 2 pushups, and some jogging in place. Once you’ve done 2 minutes a day for a week, increase it to 5, and stick with that for a week. In a month, you’ll be doing 15-20. Want to wake up early? Don’t think about waking at 5 a.m. Instead, think about waking 10 minutes earlier for a week. That’s all. Once you’ve done that, wake 10 minutes earlier than that. Baby steps.
Build on small successes. Again, if you start small for a week, you’re going to be successful. You can’t fail if you start with something ridiculously easy. Who can’t exercise for 2 minutes? (If that’s you, I apologize.) And you’ll feel successful, and good about yourself. Take that successful feeling and build on it, with another baby step. Add 2-3 minutes to your exercise routine, for example. With each step (and each step should last about a week), you will feel even more successful. Make each step really, really small, and you won’t fail. After a couple of months, your tiny steps will add up to a lot of progress and a lot of success.
Read about it daily. When I lose motivation, I just read a book or blog about my goal. It inspires me and reinvigorates me. For some reason, reading helps motivate and focus you on whatever you’re reading about. So read about your goal every day, if you can, especially when you’re not feeling motivated.
Call for help when your motivation ebbs. Having trouble? Ask for help. Email me. Join an online forum. Get a partner to join you. Call your mom. It doesn’t matter who, just tell them your problems, and talking about it will help. Ask them for advice. Ask them to help you overcome your slump. It works.
Think about the benefits, not the difficulties. One common problem is that we think about how hard something is. Exercise sounds so hard! Just thinking about it makes you tired. But instead of thinking about how hard something is, think about what you will get out of it. For example, instead of thinking about how tiring exercise can be, focus on how good you’ll feel when you’re done, and how you’ll be healthier and slimmer over the long run. The benefits of something will help energize you.
Squash negative thoughts; replace them with positive ones. Along those lines, it’s important to start monitoring your thoughts. Recognize negative self-talk, which is really what’s causing your slump. Just spend a few days becoming aware of every negative thought. Then, after a few days, try squashing those negative thoughts like a bug, and then replacing them with a corresponding positive thought. Squash, “This is too hard!” and replace it with, “I can do this! If that wimp Leo can do it, so can I!” It sounds corny, but it works. Really.

Source : Zen Habits

75 Simple Pleasures to Brighten Your Day

2009-02-26T05:32:00.000-08:00

A little trick I like to use to make my days much more pleasant is to find little, simple pleasures and sprinkle them throughout my day.

They’re not big things, but they each simple pleasure can translate to a great day if you use them right.

So in the morning, I might have a cup of coffee, and sip it slowly to enjoy it fully. I might read a gripping novel, and revel in the world of fiction. I might watch the sun come up, and marvel at the world in pastel hues.

For breakfast, I might put berries on my cereal … and I just love berries. I savor each one, closing my eyes. In the shower, I might also close my eyes, and just let the cool water run over me (I live on a tropical island, so cool water is a nice thing).

You get the idea — these are little things, and don’t really cost a thing (or not much, anyway), but they are tremendously satisfying. I’ve just described some of the things I might do to start off my day, but the possibilities are endless, and can be done throughout the day.

I thought it would be fun to compile a list of simple pleasures, to give you all some ideas of what I mean, and to spark other ideas of your own. Of course, you can probably come up with a thousand more, and it should also be noted that one person’s pleasures aren’t always pleasures for others.

Berries … mmmm.
Walking barefoot in grass.
Listening to good music in the car.
Taking a long, relaxing shower.
Coffee.
A good novel.
Popcorn and an old movie on DVD.
The smell of fresh-cut grass.
Watching the sunrise.
Walking on the beach.
A gentle morning run.
Yoga or stretching or meditation.
Snuggling in bed with your partner.
Watching the sunset.
Hugging your child tightly.
Good wine.
Dark chocolate.
Dancing like you’re crazy.
Telling jokes till your sides ache.
A long conversation with a good friend.
Root beer float.
Kissing in the rain.
Being lazy on a Sunday.
Waking to a clean house.
An uncluttered room.
Banana split.
Pillow fights.
Fries and a chocolate milkshake.
Singing in the shower, loudly.
Dancing in the rain and stomping in puddles.
Watching your child play.
Fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies.
Helping someone in need.
Making someone smile.
Homemade pie.
A nature hike.
Laying back and watching the stars.
Making a sandcastle.
Floating in the water.
Taking an afternoon nap.
Serving your spouse a surprise breakfast in bed.
Watching your children on Christmas morning.
Laying back and looking up at clouds.
Watching the ocean.
Getting a massage.
Reese’s peanut butter cups.
PB&J sandwich.
Iced green tea.
Playing footsie.
Acting crazy in public.
Seeing your savings account grow.
Seeing your debt shrink.
Taking a hot bath.
Blowing bubbles.
A gentle breeze.
The feeling after a good workout.
Checking something off your to-do list.
Snuggling together under the covers on a stormy day.
Coen brother movies.
Watching your kids play soccer.
Playing a good game of basketball.
The smell of a new Moleskine notebook.
Writing on good paper with a good pen.
A clear desk.
Fresh popped popcorn.
A fresh snow.
Swinging on a swing.
Homemade strawberry shortcake.
Watching animals in nature.
An empty email inbox.
Playing hooky.
A very slow and sensual night with your partner.
Staying up all night talking.
Having a picnic.
Swimming at night.

Source : zenhabits